Grandma

Two and a half weeks ago, my grandmother passed away. I flew home for the funeral, and upon arrival, I was informed by my mom and my sister that I was to speak there. I couldn't argue against it. Grandma had even said to me that I should speak at her funeral which, for the past ten years she had said was emminent. So here's what I wrote. It's more for the benefit of my family if they choose to read. Enjoy:

March 31, 2008

I never imagined that this day would actually be here. As illogical as it may sound, for some reason, I could never imagined that Grandma would actually die. I just pictured her waking up every day, watching "The Price is Right," reading the Tribune while eating breakfast, and from there, she would carry on with her Daily routine. Of course, there was the weekly dancing on Wednesday, the trips to Rino's on Thursday to get her hair done, and the monthly excursion to "club" (as she called it)--I never had any idea what kind of club it was or what they did there, but I knew that she looked forward to it with great anticipation the day before and the actual day of. So, because of my thinking that she would always be around, speaking at my grandmother's funeral seems completely bizarre to me.

That being said, this weekend, knowing that Grandma had passed, and knowing that I would have this opportunity to speak, has given me a chance to look back and reminisce with my sisters about the memories that we have of Grandma.

When I looked online for quotes about grandmas, I came across one that both Julie and I thought fit Grandma well. It says: "Grandmothers are just 'antique' little girls." I, for one, know this to be true. Every day, Grandma would make her bed and placed her white teddy bear on top of the pillows. She loved to dress up, to dance, to have her hair done nicely and to paint her nails. She loved being with her friends. She always cooked and kept an exceptionally clean house. She was a loving and attentive wife and mother, and she always made sure we were well-taken-care-of when we came to visit.

I always loved going to Grandma's house on Christmas Day. When we were young, we would always leave with her homemade chocolate chip cookies and little cookies, frosted with red and green icing--I don't know what they were, but I sure thought they were very tasty. As the time went by, the cookies got a little crispier, and a little browner each year until finally, she couldn't make them anymore. Though the treats are gone, the memory of her thoughtfulness and kindness still remains.

Grandma never forgot our birthdays, always making sure to send a card to make sure you got it two days beforehand.

I remember that she didn't seem to lose her temper--at least with me. I believe that it was when she went to Brigham City for my baptism where she was napping on the sofa when she was rudely awakened by a pudgy little eight-year-old who decided to run, full-speed, jump onto a chair, and dive onto the couch where, unbeknownst to him, his grandmother lay sleeping. It was mid-flight when I realized that Grandma was on my landing pad. I did my best to avoid the then-71 year-old figure who was likely scared half to death. She didn't yell or scream. She just told me to be more careful, and I scurried away, never mentioning a word of this story to anyone else, until now.

I had a unique opportunity to get to know Grandma as an adult, having had the chance to live with her and Linette for a couple of semesters while I was attending school at the University of Utah. Though living with an 80-something woman doesn't provide for the most swinging of social lives, it gave me the chance to get to know Grandma as a real person. Sometimes she drove me crazy, but many times, we had good conversations, where I learned a great deal about her. All of my friends who met her always thought she was the sweetest little old lady. Often times she would ask me "have you found yourself a little girlfriend?" to which, many times, I would respond with a sorrowful, "no." Unfortunately, now that there's a chance to respond to that question in the affirmative, Grandma's not around to ask it.

Last September, I flew back home for a long weekend to visit. While in town, I took the opportunity to go visit Grandma while she was staying at the Garden Terrace. It was nine months previous to that when I had last seen her at Christmas. I showed up, and she was in the dining room getting ready to eat with her friends there. I sat down with her. We did the "Hi, how are you doing?" thing and engaged in a little small talk. After a few minutes, she said, "You know, you remind me of my grandson, but he's in Washington DC." To which I replied, "Grandma, it's me. I'm here to visit you." She looked at me for a second and then got her "c'mon-Florence-how'd-you-get-that-one-wrong" look of surprise on her face, and then we hugged. We talked for about an hour, and then I had to go. But I was happy to see her one last time when she had most of her faculties about her. I saw her this past Christmas, but she was definitely not the same. However, I was still glad to see her one last time. It seemed that it was confirmed to me that this would be the last time that I would see her, which, sadly, last Thursday, turned out to be true.

I know that though she's gone, it's only for a little while. We'll miss her, but I know that now she's in a better place, surrounded by friends, family and loved ones, and that she's free from the pains, troubles, sickness and worries of this world. I know too, that it's all because of our Savior, Jesus Christ, that she will live again, and that through his Atonement we will be able to see her again.

Lastly, I wanted to share a couple of things I found while looking for things about grandmas online. The first comes from eight-year-olds in a school class having been asked, "what is a grandmother?"

"A grandmother is a lady who has no little children of her own, she likes other people's

"Grandmothers don't have to do anything except be there when we come to see them

"When they take us for walks, they slow down past things like pretty leaves and caterpillars.

"Usually grandmothers are fat, but not too fat to tie your shoes.

"They wear funny glasses and funny underwear.

"They can take their teeth and gums out.

"They know that we should have snack-time before bedtime, that they say prayers with us every time, and kiss us even when we've acted bad." That was the case with our grandma.

Finally, there's a poem by Amy E. Mortimer titled Grandmother:

"A grandmother who's specialWho's caring and sincere. Who's always took good care of me And always brought good cheer. A grandmother who's loving Who's patient and kind. Who's always made me smile And always on my mind. A grandmother who's sweet Who's gentle and polite.Who's always made me laugh After a scary night. You'll always be the bestNo matter where you are.You'll always be in my heartAnd in God's hands.'I love you Grandmother"