Okay, this will be brief, but I need to write down a few since it's been a while since I have made my list of weekly complaints, so here it goes:
1.) Airlines showing crappy Christmas movies because it's December. I hate this so much!! Every time I fly home for Christmas, I have to sit through a heart-warming Christmas film. They are always boring, kid-friendly flicks that make me want to scream. So, dear Santa, please make it so I don't have to watch Home Alone, Santa Clause III, a Christmas Story or any other festive movie, just show me the latest summer block-buster that has just made it's way to DVD.
2.) (as a suggestion from a friend) Dried cranberries that are flavored like other fruits. If I want to have dried fruit that tastes like cherries, I'll buy dried cherries.
3.) Smoker Neighbors. My whole apartment has a faint hint of cigarette smoke. This does not please me. I have noticed a faint hint from time to time, but at home this past week, I opened my suitcase, and the whole thing smelled of smoke. This isn't right. Luckily, though, my roommate bought an air filter, and this seems to be helping, we've got it to the point that you only smell smoke when the heat turns on, which, because it is winter, is fairly frequently.
That's all I have time to think of tonight, but I am sure I can find some more. I'll post shortly about my trip home. It'll be a lark. Stay tuned, and have a very happy new year.
Sunday, December 30, 2007
Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Smile
Um hello. So I had a hole in my tooth for about two or three months. I figured that it was a filling that had come out and needed to be replaced. You see, I could see the exact shape of the hole sometimes when I chewed gum (I know it sounds gross, but hear me out...), and the hole looked like a perfect square, so I figured it had to have been drilled that way. The reason why I let it go so long is because, I would notice that it hurt every once in a while when I was eating something, and I would say that I need to go to the dentist. However, I would usually floss, and then it would not hurt for a few more weeks.
Then, I was thinking about it at work last Wednesday, and I decided that since we're changing insurance providers at work, I had better take advantage of the coverage that I had before the end of the year. So I found a clinic about twenty feet from my apartment (more like a block) that I had no idea was even there. They told me they had an open spot that afternoon.
Long story short (to this point, at least), I wound up in the chair listening to my least-favorite song of all time, "Cat's in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin. I think this was a sign of the pain to come.
After an x-ray and the nastiest taste ever in my mouth from the equipment used to to obtain said x-ray, it turns out I actually had a cracked filling in one tooth and a hole caused by decay in the other, I found out that I would have to get a crown and a get the filling fixed. Luckily, I don't need a root canal, cause I hear those aren't fun. So anyway, I get the tough news that after insurance, I had to pay $550--this, the good doctor told me, was pretty good insurance coverage too.
So I went ahead with the work. Though I was impressed with his thorough explanation of what was to happen, I wasn't too happy with his skills of administering a shot of novicane. It was seriously the most painful shot I have ever received. He was rubbing the gum and said, "this is going to sting a bit." Holy Crap!! It felt like he took a shoved a shoved a razor blade in a was tinkering around in there. I had to clench my fists and curl my toes. It seriously brought tears to my eyes--okay it was one tear in my left eye, but still it was a tear, I have a pretty high pain threshold too.
Anyway, to make this long story a little bit shorter than it could be, we won't talk about my missing out on the gas (my favorite part of any dentist visit), what looked like smoke billowing out of my mouth while he was drilling, or the bloody stump of a former tooth I could feel when he was preparing the goop to take an impression with, and we leave it with the fact that I am going back next Saturday to have the crown permanently cemented in.
And so, my friends, $550 later, I don't have a hole in my tooth, which, in my humble opinion is good, but would have been much better if it wasn't so pricey. Oh, and I've heard that dentists are the profession most likely to commit suicide. I think it must because they feel guilty about making people feel so much pain.
Then, I was thinking about it at work last Wednesday, and I decided that since we're changing insurance providers at work, I had better take advantage of the coverage that I had before the end of the year. So I found a clinic about twenty feet from my apartment (more like a block) that I had no idea was even there. They told me they had an open spot that afternoon.
Long story short (to this point, at least), I wound up in the chair listening to my least-favorite song of all time, "Cat's in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin. I think this was a sign of the pain to come.
After an x-ray and the nastiest taste ever in my mouth from the equipment used to to obtain said x-ray, it turns out I actually had a cracked filling in one tooth and a hole caused by decay in the other, I found out that I would have to get a crown and a get the filling fixed. Luckily, I don't need a root canal, cause I hear those aren't fun. So anyway, I get the tough news that after insurance, I had to pay $550--this, the good doctor told me, was pretty good insurance coverage too.
So I went ahead with the work. Though I was impressed with his thorough explanation of what was to happen, I wasn't too happy with his skills of administering a shot of novicane. It was seriously the most painful shot I have ever received. He was rubbing the gum and said, "this is going to sting a bit." Holy Crap!! It felt like he took a shoved a shoved a razor blade in a was tinkering around in there. I had to clench my fists and curl my toes. It seriously brought tears to my eyes--okay it was one tear in my left eye, but still it was a tear, I have a pretty high pain threshold too.
Anyway, to make this long story a little bit shorter than it could be, we won't talk about my missing out on the gas (my favorite part of any dentist visit), what looked like smoke billowing out of my mouth while he was drilling, or the bloody stump of a former tooth I could feel when he was preparing the goop to take an impression with, and we leave it with the fact that I am going back next Saturday to have the crown permanently cemented in.
And so, my friends, $550 later, I don't have a hole in my tooth, which, in my humble opinion is good, but would have been much better if it wasn't so pricey. Oh, and I've heard that dentists are the profession most likely to commit suicide. I think it must because they feel guilty about making people feel so much pain.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
...Enter Steve Carell and Hilarity Ensues
I like waking up to the smell of bacon. Sue me!
Okay, the latest addition to my blog, as you may have noticed is a couple of new songs on my player. The first of which is the theme song from The Office. This is pretty much my favorite show these days. I was watching the second season last night--at least a couple of episodes. I think my favorite episode, other than the Insurance episode from the first season has to be "The Injury." This is the one where Michael Scott clamps his foot in his Foreman Grill while making bacon in his bedroom, and of course, hilarity ensues. I can't describe it well enough to do it justice. I would have posted a video clip, but cannot find one. I would suggest that you find it at watch. Just know this, it's great. Oh, and PS, if anyone wants to make my Christmas extra-super special, I would really like the third season of The Office (hint hint to my sister who has my name this year--even though I don't think she reads my blog).
'Tis the Season
Along with the song by the Scrantones, I have added a couple of my Christmas favorites. I really am not the biggest fan of Christmas music--work four holiday seasons in retail, and you'll be cured of any affection that you may have had for Christmas music. However, there are a couple of songs that I do like. Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLachlan sing my favorite, and I don't know why, but I have always liked Mariah Carey's All I want for Christmas is you--who are you to judge me? And though I really like the songs that were first in line, they have been bumped to change things up a bit. You know, I aim to please my audience, and I am sure you get sick of the same songs over and over :^)
Okay, the latest addition to my blog, as you may have noticed is a couple of new songs on my player. The first of which is the theme song from The Office. This is pretty much my favorite show these days. I was watching the second season last night--at least a couple of episodes. I think my favorite episode, other than the Insurance episode from the first season has to be "The Injury." This is the one where Michael Scott clamps his foot in his Foreman Grill while making bacon in his bedroom, and of course, hilarity ensues. I can't describe it well enough to do it justice. I would have posted a video clip, but cannot find one. I would suggest that you find it at watch. Just know this, it's great. Oh, and PS, if anyone wants to make my Christmas extra-super special, I would really like the third season of The Office (hint hint to my sister who has my name this year--even though I don't think she reads my blog).
'Tis the Season
Along with the song by the Scrantones, I have added a couple of my Christmas favorites. I really am not the biggest fan of Christmas music--work four holiday seasons in retail, and you'll be cured of any affection that you may have had for Christmas music. However, there are a couple of songs that I do like. Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLachlan sing my favorite, and I don't know why, but I have always liked Mariah Carey's All I want for Christmas is you--who are you to judge me? And though I really like the songs that were first in line, they have been bumped to change things up a bit. You know, I aim to please my audience, and I am sure you get sick of the same songs over and over :^)
Monday, December 10, 2007
Today's Things That Must Go
1). Children on leashes--this should qualify as some sort of child abuse. Yes, kids are prone to wander off, but I don't think there is any need to treat them like you would your family pet, Scruffy. It's just mean, and as such, it must go.
2). The over-use of the word awesome--This is particularly abundant in my personal (read religious) circle. We do it a lot--myself included--but we shouldn't. There are things that are truly awesome, works of art and architecture, natural beauty in the world and great speeches, etc. But to say something like a mediocre performance or a decent meal instills awe is just ridiculous. I think it takes away from the power that this word can have.
3). Jewish performers who make Christmas albums--Babs, maybe you have a "voice like butta," but I think you are exploiting my Lord and Savior by making money off of his birth when you don't even belive in him. The same can be said of Neil Diamond or Kenny G. or a whole slew of others.
4). "Moderates" who will never vote for a Democrat--this probably only bugs me, but there are plenty of people I meet who claim to not be a member of either party, and assert neutrality, but it all reality, would never vote for a Democrat. I don't feel like going off and explaining all of my feelings on this now, so I won't. But if you do it, you must go.
5). Mormons who think Mitt Romney is going to convert America, and the world--Sorry kids, he may be pretty, but I don't think that this politician's politician is the way to spread the best ideals of the Church and it's teachings. I don't like him--I'll probably post why shortly, but this could be at least a small part of the reason. Maybe I could be wrong, maybe he'll win the whole think (I don't think that will happen) and he'll be a great president. We'll see what happens when we get there, but for now these super fans of Mitt's within the Mormon church irritate me, and they must go.
2). The over-use of the word awesome--This is particularly abundant in my personal (read religious) circle. We do it a lot--myself included--but we shouldn't. There are things that are truly awesome, works of art and architecture, natural beauty in the world and great speeches, etc. But to say something like a mediocre performance or a decent meal instills awe is just ridiculous. I think it takes away from the power that this word can have.
3). Jewish performers who make Christmas albums--Babs, maybe you have a "voice like butta," but I think you are exploiting my Lord and Savior by making money off of his birth when you don't even belive in him. The same can be said of Neil Diamond or Kenny G. or a whole slew of others.
4). "Moderates" who will never vote for a Democrat--this probably only bugs me, but there are plenty of people I meet who claim to not be a member of either party, and assert neutrality, but it all reality, would never vote for a Democrat. I don't feel like going off and explaining all of my feelings on this now, so I won't. But if you do it, you must go.
5). Mormons who think Mitt Romney is going to convert America, and the world--Sorry kids, he may be pretty, but I don't think that this politician's politician is the way to spread the best ideals of the Church and it's teachings. I don't like him--I'll probably post why shortly, but this could be at least a small part of the reason. Maybe I could be wrong, maybe he'll win the whole think (I don't think that will happen) and he'll be a great president. We'll see what happens when we get there, but for now these super fans of Mitt's within the Mormon church irritate me, and they must go.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Over the River and through the Woods to Kade's House I went
It's been two weeks now, so I had better get on the ball with this posting about my Thanksgiving. Since my best friend and I were too poor to fly back to Utah, we decided to stay on the east coast (I actually consider North Carolina the South, even though it is on the coast) and have Thanksgiving. To add to the fun, our favorite 5th-grade school teacher from Tucson, AZ, Cammie Jan. Flew out to meet us. So, the day before Thanksgiving I headed south, down I-95, with about one million other people. Traffic was miserable until I got past Richmond, but ultimately I made it to Raleigh on Wednesday evening.
Cammie Jan wasn't set to get in until Thursday night, so this meant that our dinner wouldn't be held until Saturday. So I had a very traditional Thanksgiving feast on Thursday that consisted of a breakfast from Bojangles (bo-berry(sp?) biscuits of course). That afternoon, Kade and I went to the gym, while I was running, Kade futzed around, listening to his "Gospel Walking" CD and "worked out" on multiple pieces of equipment. By work out, I mean rode the bike for three minutes, used his hand as a fan complaining about the heat, and got some water, then repeated a similar routine on the eliptical trainer and the other treadmill. All that exercise served us well for our dinner, which consisted of Sweet and Sour Chicken, and General Tso's Chicken from Chinatown Express for Kade and me respectively. For dessert, hot fudge sundaes from McDonalds. See what I mean--traditional. Cammie Jan arrived safely that evening. And the next day, she and I went running in the moring while Kade went to his place of employment. That afternoon, we attempted to take advantage of Black Friday sales. I bought the least, purchasing two ties from Belks.On Saturday, after Kade and Cammie got up around noon, we got to preparing out meal. In true southern style, Kade and I donned our mullets and got to work--however, if it were true southern style, the mulleted men would be on the couch the entire time watching football and drinking beer--but I digress.
Oh what a feast we had. The menu (prepared by Kade), consited of:
Appetizers:
Blue Cheese-Ricotta Dip with Apples and Crackers
Seasoned Oyster Crackers
Bread:
Whole Wheat Yeast Rolls
Sides &Vegetables:
Orange Cranberry Sauce
Orange Scented Green Beans
Brussels Sprouts with Pancetta
Sweet Potato Casserole
Mashed Red Potatoes with Brown Gravy
Main Course:
Peach Glazed Cornish Game Hens with Cranberry Cornbread Stuffing
Turkey Cutlets with Pan Gravy
Desserts:
Miniature Lime Curd and Meringue Tarts
Too much food for all of us, but hey, that's what Thanksgiving is all about right?
This posting couldn't be complete without a mention of our little furry friend, Matza. She was our very needy helper in the kitchen.
So, that's that. I spent Thanksgiving with some of my favorite people, and had some tasty vittals--only a couple of days late. It would have been nice to be with my family, but in my humble opinion, having Thanksgiving with your best friends when you can't make it home is almost as good (and in this case, maybe even tastier).
P.S. I will make a mention that I did watch a football game during the meal preparation. However, I did my part to help out.
Another Case of the Mondays--Today's Things That Must Go!!
1). Kids with headphones turned up so loudly that the whole train can hear--True the signs say that you must have headphones to listen to your music, but if I can hear whatever hip-hop crap you're listening to, you must go. I don't force you to listen to my music, and I would appreciate it if you didn't force me to listen to yours--especially when it sounds so tinny through your little headphones, 20 feet away.
2). Skinny people who take up more than half of the Metro seat--I am a big guy. As such, when I have a chance to sit on the Metro, I opt to sit by a smaller person, and I do all I can to not encroach upon his or her space. There is a distinct line as to what 1/2 of the seat is, and it shouldn't be crossed. That being said, the past two times I got a seat on the way to work, my bench-mates did not adhere to this rule, while I did more than my fair share of not squishing my neighbor (i.e. sitting sideways with my knee smashed into the bench in front of me). As a result, I was elbowed in my ribs (unduly) for the extent of my ride to work. As such, the little lady in the red coat today simply must go!!
3.) People who smell like curry in the morning--or any strong smell for all that matters. It's very pungent, and when I want Indian food, I'd like it, but on my bus ride from home to the metro at 7:30 a.m., I don't want to smell that.
4.) Stupid Shoppers--I don't know why, but it seems that the Friday after Thanksgiving ushers in a month-long stint of absolute stupidity of shoppers. Not only are they out in droves, but for some reason, they move like snails while I am very precise in knowing what I need to pick up, and as such, want to get in and out quickly. That is not a possibility at this time of year. Case in point, Target on Saturday: I have to wait behind the old lady who takes one of the last two carts, while at the same time, setting a screen to not allow me to get the other when she's backing up. Meanwhile a feisty Asian lady moves in and grabs the only other cart. What do I do, but go find an abandoned cart, empty its belongings, including a small child, and claim it as my own (some lady started yelling at me, but I was rounding the corner and couldn't quite tell what she was saying)--okay so not quite, I did find an empty cart on one aisle, but I digress. So attention shoppers, if you're stupid, slow, or can't keep your bratty children from crying because they can't get a stinking toy, you must go!! Yes, that means you, Little ole' Lady with the ugly hat with the funky bow.
5.) Last, but certainly not least, austin collie must go!! austin is a receiver for byu, the religiously(Mormon)-affiliated rival team of my college, the University of Utah. Last week was the big rivalry game, and byu won, in part because mr. collie caught a long pass (one that most certainly should have been stopped--boo Utes!) which gave great position, and allowed them to score the winning touchdown two plays after. When asked about it, the aforementioned receiver said this..."Obviously..., when you're doing what's right, on and off the field, I think the Lord steps in and...plays a part in that." Not only is he saying here that the Almighty picks sides in a football game (like God gives a hoot in hell about sports, and if that were the case, why does Utah still lead byu in these match-ups 52-33-4?), but more offensively, he, in his own pious, self-righteous way, is saying that his team is more holy, because they "live" under their "honor code." I take offense to that because there are many fine students at my Alma matter who live good lives, probably more strictly adhering the "honor code" than many at the School Down South. However, we did it, and continue to do it without signing a peice of paper. I don't want to say that all students at that school are like mr. collie, in fact some of my best friends are byu alum, but this holier-than-thou attitude exists in many and mr. collie's exhibiting it is the embodiment of my hatred (yes, hatred) for that institution. As such, mr. collie, you must go!!
Those are my humble (and fairly heated today) opinions. Take them as you will. I am still a Utah man, sir, and will be 'til I die!!
2). Skinny people who take up more than half of the Metro seat--I am a big guy. As such, when I have a chance to sit on the Metro, I opt to sit by a smaller person, and I do all I can to not encroach upon his or her space. There is a distinct line as to what 1/2 of the seat is, and it shouldn't be crossed. That being said, the past two times I got a seat on the way to work, my bench-mates did not adhere to this rule, while I did more than my fair share of not squishing my neighbor (i.e. sitting sideways with my knee smashed into the bench in front of me). As a result, I was elbowed in my ribs (unduly) for the extent of my ride to work. As such, the little lady in the red coat today simply must go!!
3.) People who smell like curry in the morning--or any strong smell for all that matters. It's very pungent, and when I want Indian food, I'd like it, but on my bus ride from home to the metro at 7:30 a.m., I don't want to smell that.
4.) Stupid Shoppers--I don't know why, but it seems that the Friday after Thanksgiving ushers in a month-long stint of absolute stupidity of shoppers. Not only are they out in droves, but for some reason, they move like snails while I am very precise in knowing what I need to pick up, and as such, want to get in and out quickly. That is not a possibility at this time of year. Case in point, Target on Saturday: I have to wait behind the old lady who takes one of the last two carts, while at the same time, setting a screen to not allow me to get the other when she's backing up. Meanwhile a feisty Asian lady moves in and grabs the only other cart. What do I do, but go find an abandoned cart, empty its belongings, including a small child, and claim it as my own (some lady started yelling at me, but I was rounding the corner and couldn't quite tell what she was saying)--okay so not quite, I did find an empty cart on one aisle, but I digress. So attention shoppers, if you're stupid, slow, or can't keep your bratty children from crying because they can't get a stinking toy, you must go!! Yes, that means you, Little ole' Lady with the ugly hat with the funky bow.
5.) Last, but certainly not least, austin collie must go!! austin is a receiver for byu, the religiously(Mormon)-affiliated rival team of my college, the University of Utah. Last week was the big rivalry game, and byu won, in part because mr. collie caught a long pass (one that most certainly should have been stopped--boo Utes!) which gave great position, and allowed them to score the winning touchdown two plays after. When asked about it, the aforementioned receiver said this..."Obviously..., when you're doing what's right, on and off the field, I think the Lord steps in and...plays a part in that." Not only is he saying here that the Almighty picks sides in a football game (like God gives a hoot in hell about sports, and if that were the case, why does Utah still lead byu in these match-ups 52-33-4?), but more offensively, he, in his own pious, self-righteous way, is saying that his team is more holy, because they "live" under their "honor code." I take offense to that because there are many fine students at my Alma matter who live good lives, probably more strictly adhering the "honor code" than many at the School Down South. However, we did it, and continue to do it without signing a peice of paper. I don't want to say that all students at that school are like mr. collie, in fact some of my best friends are byu alum, but this holier-than-thou attitude exists in many and mr. collie's exhibiting it is the embodiment of my hatred (yes, hatred) for that institution. As such, mr. collie, you must go!!
Those are my humble (and fairly heated today) opinions. Take them as you will. I am still a Utah man, sir, and will be 'til I die!!
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Welcome to Ave. Q
So guess what I did this evening. I went with my friend, Sara, to see the Broadway musical, Ave Q at the National Theatre. Why ever would I do such a thing? Well, here's how it happened. Sara introduced the music from the show to me last Thanksgiving. At first I was a bit skeptical about it, but quickly found myself laughing nearly to tears. After hearing the music, it got stuck in my head, and I really wanted to see the show. I made two trips to NY in the meantime and the first time it was sold out. The second, we couldn't agree on what to see (a.k.a. the others wouldn't agree that they indeed wanted to see what I wanted to see), so we saw nothing. I ended up buying the music and and found myself singing along more than once.
As it turns out, the show is traveling now, and it is making a brief stint here in DC. Since Sara has a B-day coming up, she guilted me into going to the show too--she didn't have to twist my arm all that hard though. I must say it was well worth it. I mean, who couldn't love a show that has puppets and deals with 20 something people (people like me) dealing with issues of life like racism, finding your purpose in life, dating and relationships, job seeking and internet porn (in song form no less)? Here is a clip of one of my favorite songs in the show, Everyone's A Little Bit Racist"(sorry it's a bit bumpy and the sound isn't great, but I didn't film it. It's a lot better in person):
I hope you enjoyed that.
Here are a couple of photos.
Inside the National Theatre
From the balcony by our seats
Poster at the theatre after the show
Inside the National Theatre
From the balcony by our seats
Poster at the theatre after the showNo, I don't claim to be a theater aficionado, however, I would have to say that Ave Q is one of the best plays that I have seen. It's a lot of fun. PG-13 rated for sure, but in my humble opinion, it's well worth the money. If anyone here in the DC area has a chance, I would recommend that you check it out (or find out if it's going to your area and see it there). There's about a week and a half left here.
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Happy Birthday to Kade!!!
This is my Kade friend. Also pictured with the two of us is Kade's dear mother, Brenda. The picture is from a recent trip the two of them made to visit me in the District of Columbia.
It was 27 years ago today that Dear Brenda expelled Kade from her uterus. The world has been filled with joy ever since. It was 13 or so years later that I met Kade. We have been friends since then, but he's been my best-good friend since our Junior year in high school.
On my birthday, Kade sent me 26 text messages giving "26 Reasons Why We Love Darin" citing my quirks, fun/crazy memories etc. I will now attempt to do the same on my blog. So, to many of you, these won't make a lick o' sense, but here they are:
1).--He has the intelligence of...maybe an orangutan, perhaps
2).--He would rival A-nette Willie in any beauty contest, except the swim-suit competition, of course
3).--Our "put-up" list for Angelar (the previous two came from this list only modified for Kade)
4).--Jane Eyre, oh how I love that book because of Kade, maybe one day I'll read it all the way through
5).--Hello, I'm Kitty
6).--Duchess and Matza Ball
7).--The Bird Refuge--and yes, you can see the light from a mile away
8).--The overpass, and those unfortunate people with the sun-roof--boy Brigham City was boring
9).--This is hard, does there have to be 27?
10).--Denny's, the nachos, pico de gallo, and Ericka, lovely Ericka--she should go to Dillards and be fitted
11).--Billy-Bob and Nayloni and the most-foul odor I had smelled in my life
12).--The amazing techno-colored dream...(well you know the rest, Kade)
13).--The Brigham City Cemetery at night
14).--The cow lot in Nebraska with the new reigning champ of most-foul odor that I have ever smelled.
15).--Why Miss Scarlet, he's dead!! Oh and the pillow fluff and puking in the sink
16).--He types fast
17).--He reads even faster
18).--The unfortunate BenGay incident--didn't even happen to him, or to me, but hearing him laugh while I was explaining it, brought me to tears.
19).--The sweet Maddox outfit, and accompanying stories/accidents
20).--Oh, uh!
21).--He can find the greatest bargains, except for when it comes to Thanksgiving dinners
22).--Who gets Mono twice? That, and who has to have the same knee surgery three times?
23).--MWIDTM/Griz an MWINA (thanks pal!!)
24).--"Hi, can we get a menu?" "For here?"
25).--"I can't explain why I've become Miss Chatelaine"
26).--Cub river and "Not an inch"
27).--He's a great friend and has shown his loyalty many times. He listens to my problems and offers great advice, as well as keeps my ego in check. I'm lucky to count him as a friend.
Things That Must Go!! (11-26-2007)
I need to make another post for November 26 (you'll find out why shortly), so I'll keep this short.
1). People using "thx" instead of typing "thanks" in an email--I have, on occasion, used this, but have always wondered why I didn't type out the whole word, which would have taken about the same amount of time. My boss does it all the time, and of course, I won't correct her, but I shan't use it anymore.
2). Bluetooth Earpieces--People who use these look ridiculous, and they never take them off. It is a sad person who absolutely must be connected at all times. Handy for driving, maybe so, but is it really that hard to be normal and hold your phone to your head while you're walking through Target? I don't think so.
3). "Head On, Apply Directly to the Forehead"--Enough said!!
4). Drivers who will tail right behind you, and when you get over, they don't pass you--I just got back from a 4 1/2 hr. drive to Raleigh, NC. There are a number of pet peeves from driving but this one really got my goat on this trip. If you're gonna be a jerk and nearly plow into my rear end, have the decency to pass me so that I can at least give you the look.
5). LOL--I suppose this could go along with number one, but there are a number of things that bug me about the way people communicate electronically. I have never been a fan of the LOL. I opt to say "that's funny." I just have a hard time believing that people really laugh out loud at some of my lame jokes. I do, however enjoy the ROTFL or LMAO even if I don't picture someone rolling on the floor laughing, or laughing his or her ass off. So, in my humble opinion, LOL should go.
1). People using "thx" instead of typing "thanks" in an email--I have, on occasion, used this, but have always wondered why I didn't type out the whole word, which would have taken about the same amount of time. My boss does it all the time, and of course, I won't correct her, but I shan't use it anymore.
2). Bluetooth Earpieces--People who use these look ridiculous, and they never take them off. It is a sad person who absolutely must be connected at all times. Handy for driving, maybe so, but is it really that hard to be normal and hold your phone to your head while you're walking through Target? I don't think so.
3). "Head On, Apply Directly to the Forehead"--Enough said!!
4). Drivers who will tail right behind you, and when you get over, they don't pass you--I just got back from a 4 1/2 hr. drive to Raleigh, NC. There are a number of pet peeves from driving but this one really got my goat on this trip. If you're gonna be a jerk and nearly plow into my rear end, have the decency to pass me so that I can at least give you the look.
5). LOL--I suppose this could go along with number one, but there are a number of things that bug me about the way people communicate electronically. I have never been a fan of the LOL. I opt to say "that's funny." I just have a hard time believing that people really laugh out loud at some of my lame jokes. I do, however enjoy the ROTFL or LMAO even if I don't picture someone rolling on the floor laughing, or laughing his or her ass off. So, in my humble opinion, LOL should go.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
On Being Grateful
I am a whiner, I complain about practically everything. However, this being Thanksgiving and all, I think I will take a moment or two to mention a few things for which I am grateful, trying my best to look for the positive, and not focus on the negative. I expect this to be a short post :^)
Family--the people in your life over whom you have absolutely no control, but the ones you're with more than anything. Though we in my family are a weird lot sometimes--okay a lot of times--I wouldn't pick anybody else to have for my family. My parents didn't do shabby a job of raising me, and they have always supported me in what I do--even if they are a little naggy. My sisters each offer something different and special, and each of them has a cute family with some of the funnest, most-adorable kids around. I love (I don't like to use that word a lot, but it's true) them all.
God and Church--I don't know where I would be with out the basis of faith that I have in my life. I know that without God's blessings in my life, I would truly have very little. Also with my church, I had an instant family when I moved 2500 miles away from my own family. This is far too al-encompassing for me to try to explain the gratitude I do have, so I will leave it at that.
Friends--I have been very lucky in life to be able to make good friends. I have two of the best friends in my two very-best friends, Kade and Cammie Jan. We have been good buddies through thick and thin. They are two of the most amazing people, whom I can trust with anything, and with whom I am not afraid to absolutely be myself. I know can do anything, no matter how stupid, and they will still accept me. I have become friends with a lot of great people where I live now. There are some very amazing people, with whom I hope my friendships continue to grow from here on out. To any of my friends, thank you. You all are great.
My iPod--that and my daily podcasts of Radio From Hell. They make my workday much more tolerable.
My job--That I have one and that I enjoy the people with whom I work. Sometimes I start to hate it, but I am always reminded that I like my job when I go over to the office with the people whom I support in my group work.
Ben and Jerry--They make the best ice cream--well them and Maggie Moos--personal favorites from B&J are Brownie Batter and Cinnamon Roll (or Bun), and from Maggie Moos is Better Batter Cake Carnival--try them and you'll fall in love.
So that's a short list, but there is much more for which I am grateful, but now, the aforementioned Cammie Jan has landed at the airport here in Raleigh and kade and I must go pick her up.
Family--the people in your life over whom you have absolutely no control, but the ones you're with more than anything. Though we in my family are a weird lot sometimes--okay a lot of times--I wouldn't pick anybody else to have for my family. My parents didn't do shabby a job of raising me, and they have always supported me in what I do--even if they are a little naggy. My sisters each offer something different and special, and each of them has a cute family with some of the funnest, most-adorable kids around. I love (I don't like to use that word a lot, but it's true) them all.
God and Church--I don't know where I would be with out the basis of faith that I have in my life. I know that without God's blessings in my life, I would truly have very little. Also with my church, I had an instant family when I moved 2500 miles away from my own family. This is far too al-encompassing for me to try to explain the gratitude I do have, so I will leave it at that.
Friends--I have been very lucky in life to be able to make good friends. I have two of the best friends in my two very-best friends, Kade and Cammie Jan. We have been good buddies through thick and thin. They are two of the most amazing people, whom I can trust with anything, and with whom I am not afraid to absolutely be myself. I know can do anything, no matter how stupid, and they will still accept me. I have become friends with a lot of great people where I live now. There are some very amazing people, with whom I hope my friendships continue to grow from here on out. To any of my friends, thank you. You all are great.
My iPod--that and my daily podcasts of Radio From Hell. They make my workday much more tolerable.
My job--That I have one and that I enjoy the people with whom I work. Sometimes I start to hate it, but I am always reminded that I like my job when I go over to the office with the people whom I support in my group work.
Ben and Jerry--They make the best ice cream--well them and Maggie Moos--personal favorites from B&J are Brownie Batter and Cinnamon Roll (or Bun), and from Maggie Moos is Better Batter Cake Carnival--try them and you'll fall in love.
So that's a short list, but there is much more for which I am grateful, but now, the aforementioned Cammie Jan has landed at the airport here in Raleigh and kade and I must go pick her up.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Fire!! Part Two
So, today at work we are having the annual Thanksgiving pot-luck. This is not held at our corporate office, but rather at our Virginia Square (OVS) office, where I started out, and enjoy visiting from time to time. Since I was bringing funeral potatoes (per request, mind you), I decided to drive in and spend the day at OVS rather than ride metro to Rosslyn with said potatoes, then have to trapse them back again.
I get here, make my rounds, and am getting settled in, what what to my wonderin eyes should appear than flashing lights on all of the fire alarms and the most obnoxious chirping sound coming from them. Luckily I am on the third floor here rather than the 31st.
I guess this means that I'm not due for another fire drill for some time now. In my humble opinion, fire drills can be fun, but there is a toss-up between where they are more fun. At corporate, you have to go down 31 flights of stairs, but you hear the soothing voice of a talking fire alarm. At OVS, you only have one-tenth of the stairs, but you nearly go deaf from the blairing, shrill chirps emitted from fire alarms. But in both, the give you a few minutes out of the office.
I get here, make my rounds, and am getting settled in, what what to my wonderin eyes should appear than flashing lights on all of the fire alarms and the most obnoxious chirping sound coming from them. Luckily I am on the third floor here rather than the 31st.
I guess this means that I'm not due for another fire drill for some time now. In my humble opinion, fire drills can be fun, but there is a toss-up between where they are more fun. At corporate, you have to go down 31 flights of stairs, but you hear the soothing voice of a talking fire alarm. At OVS, you only have one-tenth of the stairs, but you nearly go deaf from the blairing, shrill chirps emitted from fire alarms. But in both, the give you a few minutes out of the office.
Monday, November 19, 2007
Things that Must Go!! (11-19-2007)
Hi all,
I've been out of town on travel for the past week (I'll write about that soon), and as such didn't blog much. However, I am back now, and would feel terribly amiss if I skipped out on my only weekly feature on it's third week. So here goes, the following must go:
1). Christmas music before Thanksgiving (FYI this was on my list before I heard Radio From Hell's)--It's bad enough that we are innundated by the stuff for the whole month of December. Now, it seems that Christmas music is being played earlier and earlier. The day after Halloween does not signify the offical beginning of the Christmas season. The thirty or so days from Thanksgiving to Christmas are plenty of days to celebrate. Maybe I am jaded from working in retail for four Christmases, but I do believe this over-abundance of Yule-tide joy must go.
2). People who still drive around with Bush/Cheney '04 stickers on their cars. I can understand the Kerry-Edwards folks a little more 'cause it's not hard to wonder how things could have gone differently in the past three years but they should get over it too. However, the people who were proud Bush supporters last election who don't at least question him enough to remove the stickers from their cars must be oblivious to what has happened to this country over the past seven years. If you can't get rid of that sticker, you #1, should pull your head out of the sand, and #2 you must go.
3). The watery juice on mustard and ketchup. I've heard it referred to Condirrhea. Eww. It's gross. I don't think that I should have to shake up the bottle to not have a soggy sandwich or hamburger. There must be someone out there who can invent something to rid the world of this nasty stuff.
4). People who come to the door, and rather than knock, say "knock-knock"--Just knock on the bloody door. It never really bothered my until my office neighbor pointed it out. Now it drives me nuts, and as such, it must go.
5). Men who wear baseball caps with business suits. I never noticed this in Utah, but now, everyday, on my ride to work on the Metro, I see multiple men in business suits heading into the District. When I see one of these guys with a ball cap on, I just want to rip it off and throw it out the door. I don't really know why, but I don't like it. I think these guys look like weenies, as such they must go.
I've been out of town on travel for the past week (I'll write about that soon), and as such didn't blog much. However, I am back now, and would feel terribly amiss if I skipped out on my only weekly feature on it's third week. So here goes, the following must go:
1). Christmas music before Thanksgiving (FYI this was on my list before I heard Radio From Hell's)--It's bad enough that we are innundated by the stuff for the whole month of December. Now, it seems that Christmas music is being played earlier and earlier. The day after Halloween does not signify the offical beginning of the Christmas season. The thirty or so days from Thanksgiving to Christmas are plenty of days to celebrate. Maybe I am jaded from working in retail for four Christmases, but I do believe this over-abundance of Yule-tide joy must go.
2). People who still drive around with Bush/Cheney '04 stickers on their cars. I can understand the Kerry-Edwards folks a little more 'cause it's not hard to wonder how things could have gone differently in the past three years but they should get over it too. However, the people who were proud Bush supporters last election who don't at least question him enough to remove the stickers from their cars must be oblivious to what has happened to this country over the past seven years. If you can't get rid of that sticker, you #1, should pull your head out of the sand, and #2 you must go.
3). The watery juice on mustard and ketchup. I've heard it referred to Condirrhea. Eww. It's gross. I don't think that I should have to shake up the bottle to not have a soggy sandwich or hamburger. There must be someone out there who can invent something to rid the world of this nasty stuff.
4). People who come to the door, and rather than knock, say "knock-knock"--Just knock on the bloody door. It never really bothered my until my office neighbor pointed it out. Now it drives me nuts, and as such, it must go.
5). Men who wear baseball caps with business suits. I never noticed this in Utah, but now, everyday, on my ride to work on the Metro, I see multiple men in business suits heading into the District. When I see one of these guys with a ball cap on, I just want to rip it off and throw it out the door. I don't really know why, but I don't like it. I think these guys look like weenies, as such they must go.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
11-12-2007 Things That Must Go
Today's things that must go are the following:
1). Spam--Not the emails (though they are annoying too), the ambiguous meat product. Actually all ambiguous meat products are quite scary. Well, there are some who really like Spam, so maybe it shouldn't go entirely. But, the worst part about Spam is that awful-looking jelly on the top. That is just vile. It must go!!
2). Manipulative emails--Everyone gets them from friends or co-workers, the type that push a political point or a religious agenda. The worst part about them is when they say something along the lines that "if you don't forward this to everyone you know..." either, you hate Jesus, you don't support our troops, or the terrorists have won and they are going to force us to marry people of the same gender. Sorry, I don't buy it. I think that I can love my country, or my Lord and Savior just as much much as the next guy without clogging up my friends' inboxes. However, people who know me and my political leanings have, on occasion, forwarded funny political emails to me, and I appreciate them from time to time.
3). Football Players with Long Hair Coming out the Back of Their Helmets--It just looks ridiculous. I always want someone to just grab those flowing locks of hair and just pull the guy down.
4). (Suggestion from a friend, but I support it) Grocery Store Discount Cards--They were fun at first, now every store has them. And, if you don't have one of your own, they will swipe the card that they have at every register for customers who don't have a card. It would save time and money and a lot of hassle if they would just do away with them and give me the freaking discount without my needing to have a huggin' card.
5). The "Obsession" with Brittney Spears--Sure she's a train wreck, but I don't need to hear about every minute detail of her life. She's trashy, and has a lot more money than I likely ever will have, so it kinda makes me smile to think that she's such a mess. But really, I would be fine to never hear anything about her again--positive or negative. But, she is living proof that you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. The media's obsession with her must go!!!
And those are today's things that must go. Please provide comments and suggestions for future lists. On that note, I must go to sleep.
1). Spam--Not the emails (though they are annoying too), the ambiguous meat product. Actually all ambiguous meat products are quite scary. Well, there are some who really like Spam, so maybe it shouldn't go entirely. But, the worst part about Spam is that awful-looking jelly on the top. That is just vile. It must go!!2). Manipulative emails--Everyone gets them from friends or co-workers, the type that push a political point or a religious agenda. The worst part about them is when they say something along the lines that "if you don't forward this to everyone you know..." either, you hate Jesus, you don't support our troops, or the terrorists have won and they are going to force us to marry people of the same gender. Sorry, I don't buy it. I think that I can love my country, or my Lord and Savior just as much much as the next guy without clogging up my friends' inboxes. However, people who know me and my political leanings have, on occasion, forwarded funny political emails to me, and I appreciate them from time to time.
3). Football Players with Long Hair Coming out the Back of Their Helmets--It just looks ridiculous. I always want someone to just grab those flowing locks of hair and just pull the guy down.
4). (Suggestion from a friend, but I support it) Grocery Store Discount Cards--They were fun at first, now every store has them. And, if you don't have one of your own, they will swipe the card that they have at every register for customers who don't have a card. It would save time and money and a lot of hassle if they would just do away with them and give me the freaking discount without my needing to have a huggin' card.
5). The "Obsession" with Brittney Spears--Sure she's a train wreck, but I don't need to hear about every minute detail of her life. She's trashy, and has a lot more money than I likely ever will have, so it kinda makes me smile to think that she's such a mess. But really, I would be fine to never hear anything about her again--positive or negative. But, she is living proof that you can take the girl out of the trailer park, but you can't take the trailer park out of the girl. The media's obsession with her must go!!!
And those are today's things that must go. Please provide comments and suggestions for future lists. On that note, I must go to sleep.
Thursday, November 8, 2007
Fire!!
Today at work, they had a mandatory fire drill. This is all good and well, but you may not know that I work on the 31st floor of my building. Sure, having the top floor of one of the tallest buildings in Arlington makes for some great views, including yesterday's sun-set, which was one of the prettiest that I have seen. However, when there's a fire drill, you can't use the elevator. So, we had to go down 31 flights of stairs. By the time we made it there, everyone was complaining that their legs felt like jell-o. That wasn't the worst, though. I was getting dizzy by going around and around. This is a picture from the bottom of my building looking up at the top after we all got out.
In my humble opinion, going down 31 flights of stairs is not fun, but I am certainly glad I wasn't like some of my female colleagues who were in 3 inch heels.
In my humble opinion, going down 31 flights of stairs is not fun, but I am certainly glad I wasn't like some of my female colleagues who were in 3 inch heels.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Vote for Lola
Hi All,
A friend of mine is having an online poll on her blog. She is looking for a name for her fantastic new Kitchen Aid Mixer. I believe it should be named Lola Falana, after the 60's and 70's dancer, singer, actress extraordinare (I really don't know who she is, but I like her name). I would appreciate your vote for that name. You can vote for and see a picture of Lola here. In my humble opinion, a mixer named Lola would be awesome!!
A friend of mine is having an online poll on her blog. She is looking for a name for her fantastic new Kitchen Aid Mixer. I believe it should be named Lola Falana, after the 60's and 70's dancer, singer, actress extraordinare (I really don't know who she is, but I like her name). I would appreciate your vote for that name. You can vote for and see a picture of Lola here. In my humble opinion, a mixer named Lola would be awesome!!
Electile Dysfunction
Okay, so the title's not original, nor is it all that classy, but it makes me smile a bit, so that's that.You see, Tuesday, November 6 was election day. And like all other off-year elections, there wasn't a lot going on. However, in the races of which I am aware, my Dems performed rather well.
Nationally, Mississippi's republican governor was easily re-elected (no big surprise there), but in Kentucky, the Democratic challenger unseated the republican governor. Could this mean anything for Senate Minority Leader, Mitch McConnell? Here's hoping so. Those were probably two of the bigger races that were going on in the country (see, off-year elections are pretty boring).
However, on a local note, here in the Commonwealth of Virginia the entire State Assembly was up for re-election. What does this mean to me? Not a lot, considering I live in the Democratic bastion that is Fairfax County--more specifically "Falls Church" (in parenthesies because of the whole un-incorporated Fairfax County/Falls Church propper rigamorole), where opponents of the repug-type are hard to come by. However, there were key races in the State Senate that needed to be won by the Democrats to wrest control of the chamber from the reps., and they did it. They needed, and won four. There is a fifth that has not been decided yet since there is only a 90-vote difference, and there will likely be a recount. So now, my Dems have the governorship, and one of the houses of the State Assembly here in the Commonwealth--Hooray!
Since I am a native Utahn and was a student of Politcal Science, how could I possibly not mention all of the fun that happened in the Beehive State yesterday. Ralph Becker (D) trounced his opponent, Dave Buhler (r) in the race to become the next mayor of Salt Lake City--see Dave, people don't like you (click here if that doesn't make sense to you). I want to give a shout out to Bianca and Curtis and the other Young Dems who worked hard on the campaign, good job guys.
More importantly in Utah yesterday, the proposal to take money from public schools to give a tax break to parents who have their children in private schools went down in flames. The Voucher proposal was defeated in every county in the state.
I personally have been opposed to this since I heard about the bill that was in the legislature when I was an intern there in 2005. It's never made sense to me that taking money from schools would help them to improve. The bill finally passed the legislature in 2007 but the people of Utah, in their wisdom, did not want it.
My reasons for not liking the vouchers include (but are not limited to) these:
1). Vouchers will ultimately take dollars from public schools.
2). Private schools don't even require licensed teachers.
3). Vouchers are another tax-break for the wealthy.
4). Private schools are not required to accept all students, and as such, vouchers can leave many students behind.
5). (and very importantly) Public funds from vouchers would be going to private, religious institutions. That, is not constitutional, and would likely end up costing the state a lot of money in court costs.
So hooray!! Vouchers in Utah are dead (for now at least--just wait until the nasty pro-voucher people find a way to resurrect the issue). Of course I am not naive enough to believe that there isn't need for change in the public school system. In my humble opinion, however, vouchers are not the answer. Way to go Utah--voting progressivly for a change.
Monday, November 5, 2007
Somebody's Got a Case of the Mondays--My List of Things That Must Go
Dear Readers,
I have been wanting to add a weekly feature to the blog for a while. I have seen others' blogs who have a "Wordless Wednesday," which I like, but I don't think I should do because I have seen it a couple of times, and fear that my adding it would make it cliche (sorry I don't know how to make accent marks here). Now don't you be thinking that this idea of having a pet peeves list titled "Things That Must Go" is a Darin original. No, I will give credit where credit is due. I am ripping the idea off from "The Radio From Hell Show" (Kerry, Bill and Gina, X96, KXRK, Provo, Ogden, Salt Lake City). Their segment on the show happens every Wednesday, having the hosts' lists one week and a list from listeners the next week.
I decided to make it on Monday since that seems to be everyone's least favorite day of the workweek. Oh, and bare in mind that these will not exclusively be mine, but rather, I hope to have a conglomoration of various sources, including the aforementioned radio show whose podcast I listen to faithfully, friends and coworkers. I would invite anyone who wishes to add their things that must go to make a comment and I will try to incorporate them. So without any further ado, I give you my debut list of things that must go:
1) Mondays--As I previously mentioned, this is the least favorite day of the work week to many people. It means the weekend of fun and revelry are over, and we must return to our respecitve places of employment for 40+ more hours of hell. Let's face it, even if you love your job, everyone must admit that their secret wish is to be independently weathly, not having to dread the alarm at 6:00 a.m. on Monday morning. However, I do have to say, that if Monday wasn't the first day of the work week, we would all hate Tuesday. This brings me to number two...
2) Tuesdays--Tuesday, in my humble opinion, is the most worthless day of the week. It turns out that Monday usually ends up being a productive day, and it goes by rather quickly. Before you know it, it's already Tuesday. Three days of the week have something significant, Monday is the beginning of the week, Wednesday is hump day, and Friday is, well Friday. This leaves Tuesday and Thursday without any significance in the week--filler days really. Thurday is superior to Tuesday in that it is only a day away from Friday. Ergo, Tuesdays must go!
3) Toupees--Sorry men, you're not fooling anyone, except yourselves. If you don't have the self-respect to let nature take its course, you should get counseling. Speaking as one who is thinning up top, Deal With It!! Even a comb-over, as rediculous as comb-overs are, looks better than a man with a white, pencil-thin moustache wearing a (theoretically) perfectly-coiffed, oily-looking rug on his head. I saw that today on the Metro ride to work. I had to take a picture and I will post it later today, so check back.
4) People who say supposably--It's SUPPOSEDLY!! Oh, and it's ambulance, not amblience!
5) Oprah Winfrey--I hate her!! I work in the building that houses the local ABC affiliate for the Washington DC area. So when I was walking in, they were showing Good Morning America on the giant screen outside, and guess who was on--none other than Ms. Winfrey. It pissed me off instantly, just her air and arrogance that showed through. I think the reason why I don't like her is the same reason I heard a comedian once say she likes her: "She thinks she's Jesus." The woman seriously has delusions of grandeur (not to say that she doesn't do a lot of good things). I rememeber hearing her say very matter-of-factly "I always knew I was destined for greatness." I can't hardly stand her anymore. One last note is that I loved a line that I heard on an 80's sit-com when one character thought she saw a UFO, she said, "Airplanes aren't that thin, or that bright." To which another character responded, "neither is Oprah Winfrey, but it doesn't make her a UFO."
So, there they are, today's things that must go.
I have been wanting to add a weekly feature to the blog for a while. I have seen others' blogs who have a "Wordless Wednesday," which I like, but I don't think I should do because I have seen it a couple of times, and fear that my adding it would make it cliche (sorry I don't know how to make accent marks here). Now don't you be thinking that this idea of having a pet peeves list titled "Things That Must Go" is a Darin original. No, I will give credit where credit is due. I am ripping the idea off from "The Radio From Hell Show" (Kerry, Bill and Gina, X96, KXRK, Provo, Ogden, Salt Lake City). Their segment on the show happens every Wednesday, having the hosts' lists one week and a list from listeners the next week.
I decided to make it on Monday since that seems to be everyone's least favorite day of the workweek. Oh, and bare in mind that these will not exclusively be mine, but rather, I hope to have a conglomoration of various sources, including the aforementioned radio show whose podcast I listen to faithfully, friends and coworkers. I would invite anyone who wishes to add their things that must go to make a comment and I will try to incorporate them. So without any further ado, I give you my debut list of things that must go:
1) Mondays--As I previously mentioned, this is the least favorite day of the work week to many people. It means the weekend of fun and revelry are over, and we must return to our respecitve places of employment for 40+ more hours of hell. Let's face it, even if you love your job, everyone must admit that their secret wish is to be independently weathly, not having to dread the alarm at 6:00 a.m. on Monday morning. However, I do have to say, that if Monday wasn't the first day of the work week, we would all hate Tuesday. This brings me to number two...
2) Tuesdays--Tuesday, in my humble opinion, is the most worthless day of the week. It turns out that Monday usually ends up being a productive day, and it goes by rather quickly. Before you know it, it's already Tuesday. Three days of the week have something significant, Monday is the beginning of the week, Wednesday is hump day, and Friday is, well Friday. This leaves Tuesday and Thursday without any significance in the week--filler days really. Thurday is superior to Tuesday in that it is only a day away from Friday. Ergo, Tuesdays must go!
3) Toupees--Sorry men, you're not fooling anyone, except yourselves. If you don't have the self-respect to let nature take its course, you should get counseling. Speaking as one who is thinning up top, Deal With It!! Even a comb-over, as rediculous as comb-overs are, looks better than a man with a white, pencil-thin moustache wearing a (theoretically) perfectly-coiffed, oily-looking rug on his head. I saw that today on the Metro ride to work. I had to take a picture and I will post it later today, so check back.
4) People who say supposably--It's SUPPOSEDLY!! Oh, and it's ambulance, not amblience!
5) Oprah Winfrey--I hate her!! I work in the building that houses the local ABC affiliate for the Washington DC area. So when I was walking in, they were showing Good Morning America on the giant screen outside, and guess who was on--none other than Ms. Winfrey. It pissed me off instantly, just her air and arrogance that showed through. I think the reason why I don't like her is the same reason I heard a comedian once say she likes her: "She thinks she's Jesus." The woman seriously has delusions of grandeur (not to say that she doesn't do a lot of good things). I rememeber hearing her say very matter-of-factly "I always knew I was destined for greatness." I can't hardly stand her anymore. One last note is that I loved a line that I heard on an 80's sit-com when one character thought she saw a UFO, she said, "Airplanes aren't that thin, or that bright." To which another character responded, "neither is Oprah Winfrey, but it doesn't make her a UFO."
So, there they are, today's things that must go.
Monday, October 29, 2007
Obscure Anniversaries
Okay, so today marks two separate anniversaries from the past two years. One is the particular day of the week, and the other is the actual date.
If You Get Caught Between Some Thugs and New York City
First off, two years ago on October 28-29, I was en route to Boston when I was mugged. A fellow intern and I had a brief stop in NYC while waiting for our transfer bus. Since the Port Authority bus terminal is located right next to Times Square, we decided to go check it out. This was my first time to set foot in New York and Chris' second time there. I kid you not, that I had been in the city for fifteen minutes when I called 911 to tell them I had been mugged. Everything turned out well. The fine men and women of the NYPD apprehended the thugs who accosted my friend and me, but they say they never found my $20. So I was out a wallet (kept for evidence, but all inside was returned) and a bus ticket. But I got to continue onto Bean town and had a great time there. Now, every time that I go to the Big Apple, I take the people with me to show them the exact spot where the crime took place. The thing that pissed me off the most was that one guy, who actually stole stuff from Chris started running away, turned around and came to me, swore at me and punched me. He didn't need to do that. However, that only helped me to better identify him when he was apprehended. It also got him increased charges.
Blind Melon
Now, last year: It was the second Monday on my job. I had to go to the store to buy apple cider for an FHE activity. Tonight is the Monday after my 1 year anniversary at my job. You see, that night, I think I became the worst person in the world officially. When I was walking back to the metro to take the cider to the church, I came across a blind man. He was walking with his stick to help him I was in a hurry, and I tried to get well out of his way. The thing is, those little sticks have quite the range. The man stuck it right between my legs mid-stride. When I took my next step, there was a SNAP and then the stick came out of the blind man's hand. He cussed. I apologized, and picked up the limp, broken stick and returned it to him. I believe I missed the train that was coming and just went to my platform. A few minutes later I saw him descend the stairs, having managed to fix his walking utensil. I felt bad, and then I felt worse cause I laughed at the situation. I saw him once more, but that's it. I guess I can take comfort in the fact that he can't see me. However, up to this day. I try to stay far away from blind people whenever I see them. When they are near me I say to myself "go away, don't you know I am dangerous?" I actually saw a blind man getting off the Metro, and that is what made me remember the momentous occasion of this anniversary. On a side note, I had a friend in high school who's mother was (I assume she still is) blind. She was a dear, sweet lady. I only spoke with her a couple of times, but when I would talk with her, I always noticed that she would say "it's nice to see you again." I would think "but wait...?" Then I would quietly chuckle to myself.
So, in my humble opinion, the NYPD has great men and women working for them. Also, I hope that hell is a lovely place as I am almost assuredly going to spend my eternities there.
If You Get Caught Between Some Thugs and New York City
First off, two years ago on October 28-29, I was en route to Boston when I was mugged. A fellow intern and I had a brief stop in NYC while waiting for our transfer bus. Since the Port Authority bus terminal is located right next to Times Square, we decided to go check it out. This was my first time to set foot in New York and Chris' second time there. I kid you not, that I had been in the city for fifteen minutes when I called 911 to tell them I had been mugged. Everything turned out well. The fine men and women of the NYPD apprehended the thugs who accosted my friend and me, but they say they never found my $20. So I was out a wallet (kept for evidence, but all inside was returned) and a bus ticket. But I got to continue onto Bean town and had a great time there. Now, every time that I go to the Big Apple, I take the people with me to show them the exact spot where the crime took place. The thing that pissed me off the most was that one guy, who actually stole stuff from Chris started running away, turned around and came to me, swore at me and punched me. He didn't need to do that. However, that only helped me to better identify him when he was apprehended. It also got him increased charges.
Blind Melon
Now, last year: It was the second Monday on my job. I had to go to the store to buy apple cider for an FHE activity. Tonight is the Monday after my 1 year anniversary at my job. You see, that night, I think I became the worst person in the world officially. When I was walking back to the metro to take the cider to the church, I came across a blind man. He was walking with his stick to help him I was in a hurry, and I tried to get well out of his way. The thing is, those little sticks have quite the range. The man stuck it right between my legs mid-stride. When I took my next step, there was a SNAP and then the stick came out of the blind man's hand. He cussed. I apologized, and picked up the limp, broken stick and returned it to him. I believe I missed the train that was coming and just went to my platform. A few minutes later I saw him descend the stairs, having managed to fix his walking utensil. I felt bad, and then I felt worse cause I laughed at the situation. I saw him once more, but that's it. I guess I can take comfort in the fact that he can't see me. However, up to this day. I try to stay far away from blind people whenever I see them. When they are near me I say to myself "go away, don't you know I am dangerous?" I actually saw a blind man getting off the Metro, and that is what made me remember the momentous occasion of this anniversary. On a side note, I had a friend in high school who's mother was (I assume she still is) blind. She was a dear, sweet lady. I only spoke with her a couple of times, but when I would talk with her, I always noticed that she would say "it's nice to see you again." I would think "but wait...?" Then I would quietly chuckle to myself.
So, in my humble opinion, the NYPD has great men and women working for them. Also, I hope that hell is a lovely place as I am almost assuredly going to spend my eternities there.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Spooktacular Halloween Party
Hi, It's late, and I have to work tomorrow, but I thought I would post some pictures from the fun-filled Halloween party I went to last night. My reason for doing this is to show the world my super-cool costume, which won me 2nd place in the costume contest (I got a lot of comments from others that I should have won 1st place).
The funny thing is that earlier in the day I had no intentions of wearing a costume to the party. You see, I cleaned out the fridge at my apartment, which was disgusting. After that, I knew that I needed to get some cleaning supplies at Target so I called Sara. We went and while I was there, I thought I should be Papa Smurf. So in the next few hours, we amassed the supplies to make me a smurftastic costume. With her help, I became this.
Papa Smurf (a.k.a. Me)
Sara (my costume designer) as a witch with me
Shelly, Sundee, Sara and Karen as some of my favorite candies
Melanie, Cat and Amy looking lovely, like something from a Jane Austin novel, which was their intent.
Alexis and Jennie as Hot Sauce from Taco Bell
Brian--Shocking!!
When it came to the costume contest, however, I lost out to Madonna. I felt a little jipped since she had a huge entourage that cheered really loudly for her right by the judges. But, all-in-all, I have got to give props to Cubby for her great portrayal of the Material Girl, even though I did think that is was Phyllis Diller for a minute.
The great thing about winning second place is the prize. You see I got a toy gun, and the winner of first prize won a coupon for a plate of cookies from the guys who live at the "Party Palace" where the party was held. I know that I would never have redeemed the coupon, so I can take comfort in knowing that I walked away with something.
So, in my smurfing opinion, this Halloween smurf was smurfarific.
The funny thing is that earlier in the day I had no intentions of wearing a costume to the party. You see, I cleaned out the fridge at my apartment, which was disgusting. After that, I knew that I needed to get some cleaning supplies at Target so I called Sara. We went and while I was there, I thought I should be Papa Smurf. So in the next few hours, we amassed the supplies to make me a smurftastic costume. With her help, I became this.
Papa Smurf (a.k.a. Me)There were all sorts of fun costumes there:
Sara (my costume designer) as a witch with me
Shelly, Sundee, Sara and Karen as some of my favorite candies
Melanie, Cat and Amy looking lovely, like something from a Jane Austin novel, which was their intent.
Alexis and Jennie as Hot Sauce from Taco Bell
Brian--Shocking!!
The great thing about winning second place is the prize. You see I got a toy gun, and the winner of first prize won a coupon for a plate of cookies from the guys who live at the "Party Palace" where the party was held. I know that I would never have redeemed the coupon, so I can take comfort in knowing that I walked away with something.
So, in my smurfing opinion, this Halloween smurf was smurfarific.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Sending Our Love (and Money) down the Well
Okay, so I am a little miffed right now. I just finished reading a story about someone who most Americans won't know by name. However, I would dare say that most Americans over the age of 25 know who she is, and may even feel a slight connection to her. You see, it was 20 years ago this week that Jessica McClure wandered away and fell into a well in her (or possibly a neighbor's, I'm not too sure) backyard. She was stuck underground in an eight inch pipe, and rescuers worked around the clock for 58 hours to free her while an American audience watched the harrowing experience unfold on their television screens.
Luckily, all went well. Baby Jessica, then 18 months old, was freed from her three-day prison with minimal injuries. A photo of the rescue won a Pulitzer Prize, a made-for-tv movie was made about the event (Patty Duke starred--that was big time in the eighties), if I am not mistaken, there was a semi-parody of the event on the Simpsons, and thousands of "well-wishers" (pun intended I am sure) sent donations to her family. These donations have been put into a trust fund that will mature in 3 1/2 years when Jessica, now a married mother of a baby boy named Simon, will turn 25. The estimated value of the fund is $1 Million.
Now here is where I take issue with this tale. I am certainly glad that she was rescued. I am glad that she has had the chance to live a full, healthy life. But for crying out loud, where is the reward for those of us who managed to make it through the eighties unscathed. I see this as rewarding her parents for irresponsibility. Now, because they let their little girl wander off (or worse yet, knowingly let her play by a dangerous well), she and her child are set for life. I read the article, and it reports that she has no memory of the event. I wouldn't be surprised if she's a little claustrophobic, but is it worth $1 Million? My humble opinion is no. Seriously, give me a hole to fall into, if I can get a cool million after all is said and done, I'd be happy for the experience.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Milton, Pass the Cake So Everyone Gets a Piece
I don't know of anyone who hasn't seen the movie "Office Space," or who hasn't laughed out loud while watching "The Office" on TV. Though they are both a little over the top, I find myself more and more able to relate to them with the passage of time at my own office.In particular, I found myself relating to a couple of awkward office birthday parties portrayed on these programs, and I tried and tried to find some youtube clip that shows what I'm talking about, but I couldn't find the proper clip from either. Nonetheless, I have found a funny one that does show an awkward office party. And, since I have a growing affinity for all things Indian, I find it very appropriate that the clip be in an Indian office.
(our singing wasn't much better)
So as you can likely guess, there was an office party last week. Yep, a lady in HR celebrated her 50th birthday. I had no idea she was 50, I would have guess 45 maybe. Anyway, she is the one who is responsible for sending out the congratulatory email I received for my birthday--we won't worry about the fact that it was nearly two weeks late.
Anyway, though I am in the corporate office, there aren't many people there on a given day. We had a good majority of the office there that day and there were about ten folks. So the awkwardness came from the fact that no one really talked much--other than the lady a co-worker and I have dubbed "Granny Panties." I don't know who she is or what she does, all I ever noticed is that she has an interesting sense of style that usually works, but oftentimes has and odd, brightly-colored accent piece that just doesn't, and I don't think I have seen her wear the same thing twice in my six months in this current office. However, said co-worker has had frightening experiences walking into the ladies room. Apparently GP doesn't close the door to the stall. Apparently the co-worker has had the image of her under-apparel seared into her memory. Direct quote: "I don't know how they were so big. She's a small person, but they're so big and white. It's like a canoe." So, I laugh every time that I see her. Having heard her talk, I am thinking she's just a little different.
So after the possibly law-suit-inducing gag gifts that were given by the HR manager (all I am saying is I would be offended if someone gave me a black Over the Hill hat, denture cream and denture adhesive), they cut up the cake and handed it out to everyone. Everyone, that is, except for one woman who was going to "be strong" and not eat any. Her strength lasted all of one minute in which she said "that looks good, ah S#!T, I am so week," grabbed a piece, and ate it up. I ate my cake in silence, and promptly left. I had nothing to add. I hardly know most of these people (If I were at my old office in the company, it would be a different story).
I don't know where I am going with this, but I thought I would share. In my humble opinion, Birthdays are great, working on your birthday is not so great. But if I can get a piece of birthday cake while at work, I'll be cool with whatever.
Anyway, though I am in the corporate office, there aren't many people there on a given day. We had a good majority of the office there that day and there were about ten folks. So the awkwardness came from the fact that no one really talked much--other than the lady a co-worker and I have dubbed "Granny Panties." I don't know who she is or what she does, all I ever noticed is that she has an interesting sense of style that usually works, but oftentimes has and odd, brightly-colored accent piece that just doesn't, and I don't think I have seen her wear the same thing twice in my six months in this current office. However, said co-worker has had frightening experiences walking into the ladies room. Apparently GP doesn't close the door to the stall. Apparently the co-worker has had the image of her under-apparel seared into her memory. Direct quote: "I don't know how they were so big. She's a small person, but they're so big and white. It's like a canoe." So, I laugh every time that I see her. Having heard her talk, I am thinking she's just a little different.
So after the possibly law-suit-inducing gag gifts that were given by the HR manager (all I am saying is I would be offended if someone gave me a black Over the Hill hat, denture cream and denture adhesive), they cut up the cake and handed it out to everyone. Everyone, that is, except for one woman who was going to "be strong" and not eat any. Her strength lasted all of one minute in which she said "that looks good, ah S#!T, I am so week," grabbed a piece, and ate it up. I ate my cake in silence, and promptly left. I had nothing to add. I hardly know most of these people (If I were at my old office in the company, it would be a different story).
I don't know where I am going with this, but I thought I would share. In my humble opinion, Birthdays are great, working on your birthday is not so great. But if I can get a piece of birthday cake while at work, I'll be cool with whatever.
Thursday, October 4, 2007
You Can Never Go Home, But You Must Try
Ah, Home sweet...well, it's where I grew up at least
These are the Mountains that I know, far cooler than the AppalachiansAt one point in my life (my teen-age years) I had a card that had some ground rules for Zen. There were something like twelve points of wisdom. The two points that I remember verbatim were "Wherever you go, there you are," and "You can never go home, but you must try." So, in keeping to the advice given by the latter, I went to my hometown last month. "Where is home?" you may ask. I shall tell you, it is Brigham City, Utah (click the link and learn up).
Brigham City is an interesting place. It's a small town. I realize every time that I go back there just how small it is. There are eight stop lights total. We do have a Wal-mart and most of the typical fast-food restaurants that you could think of (that are found in Utah at least). On the subject of food though, they do have Maddox, which has some very tasty rolls, and my favorite turkey steak. There are less than 20,000 people who reside there, and I can't imagine there ever being many more.
I will say that it's a nice place to be from, but I am sure that it's a place that I would ever like to be living again. It's a quaint little town, and there are plenty of strange little quirks that make me not want to live there anymore--mostly because I don't think I want to live in a small town anymore, but I digress.
So that being said, I did go back home for a long weekend. You see, it was Peach Days. I hate Peach Days, but this year, my sister who moved to Colorado was going to be in town. Also, I have a friend who normally goes back home for Peach Days, and I thought she would be going this time too. She didn't (I guess that's what I get for assuming). It was a good trip home. I didn't get to spend much time with friends there, but I got to see my family, and I kinda like them. However, as the title suggests, you really can never go home [and have everything be the same]. With every trip back, I find that I relate less and less with them.
That isn't to say that I think they are weird, or anything. I just don't have a ton in common at this point in my life. I live on the east coast in the very-well-populated DC metropolitan area. Most of them, live in small town Utah. I am the only one in my family who is not married with at least two children. Our experiences are just different that's all. So they all have their own lives, and my life is pretty much out here in Virginia now, I guess that's what I am trying to say. Not that I don't like being with them, cause I do, a lot. It's just that I kinda feel like the odd man out.
So, one of the best parts of being home was being able to see all of my nieces and nephews. Though I hate most kids, I love these ones. They kind of even make me want to have some of my own one day. I didn't get many pictures of grown ups while I was home, so the kids will have to do as an introduction to my family. So here they are:
Kalee and Brady (Family N)
Hunter (N)
Brock (N)
Tanner and Alissa (A)
Marshall (N*)
MaKayla and Max(N*)
Playing before the parade (their parents aren't irresponsible enough to just let them play by the road)
I just have to say that I have the cutest nieces and nephews in the world. Each of them offers something special, and in my humble opinion, they made the trip home a lot of fun.
(*note to my sisters, if I spelled any of the children's names wrong, I apologize. It's not my fault if you chose to spell their names in a funky way that isn't the normal way I would spell them)
(*note to my sisters, if I spelled any of the children's names wrong, I apologize. It's not my fault if you chose to spell their names in a funky way that isn't the normal way I would spell them)
Sunday, September 23, 2007
It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia
So how's this for fun. On Saturday last I, along with some friends took a trip to the City of Brotherly Love. This was the third such trip to said city in my life. Every time it seems to get better. The first was a trip two years ago, and I decided that it was about the biggest hole in America. I gave it another chance in January, and I found that there is a lot more that the city could offer, including an exhibit about King Tutenkhamun. However that day it was too late and I decided that I wanted to make it back to see it. Since the exhibit is closing next week, I knew I had to go soon. So, four of us, Amy, Sydney, Reed and I loaded up and left early in the a.m. to make the journey to Philadelphia.
Amy and Sydney Walking Like EgyptiansBy the time we were done, we were pretty hungry, so we decided to get a pretzel from a street vendor. They ended up being a little soggy, but they were satisfying nonetheless.
We went to see some of the local sites of Philly and here are some photos to document the day.
Reed in a Monopoly Wheelbarrow 
Fountain at Logan Square
Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell
Ahh, Precious (I know I look like a fool)
Closer to the reality of my life
Rocky!!
Sydney and me after running up the Rocky stepsBefore we left town, we decided to get a cheesesteak from Pat's King of Steaks, which is one of the two most famous places in town. It was very tasty indeed.
Enjoying cheesesteaks and fries at Pat's
Enjoying cheesesteaks and fries at Pat'sAll-in-all, I have to say that my humble opinion of Philadelphia is improving with every visit there. The history, the museums, and the amazing murals throughout the city give it a distinct charm that is a bit different from any other city that I have been to. I am sure to go back and see more. I hope you have enjoyed this adventure Saturday as well as I did.
(on an unrelated note, I am sorry that this isn't very witty. I am tired and not in the mood to think of funny lines today. Maybe next time)
Monday, September 17, 2007
Hey Y'all
Music City USA!!
Sweet!!For Labor Day weekend, a friend of mine and I decided to take a trip to Nashville, TN. I had been there once before and enjoyed it, so I thought it could be fun, and a whole lot less expensive than the other option of going to New York City.
You may not know this about me, but I am a bit of an elitist snob. I have said in the past that if you are ever feeling bad about yourself, all you need to do is to go to the closest Wal-Mart and take a look around. You'll realize that your life isn't all that bad. And what is the South but one humongous Wal-Mart? Everywhere you look you see mullets, ill-fitting Nascar tee shirts, toothless-folk chewin' tobacco. There are large women with even larger hair who just haven't been properly fit up top if you get my drift--though they probably don't have a lady who can help them when the buy their delicates in bulk at the Piggly-Wiggly (note I don't really know what they sell at the PW, I only know that I have seen a couple of them in my adventures to the south). So when you're down south, you can't help but think "my life is pretty decent." Who needs Prozac? A trip to Dixie is a sure-fired way to clear up any bout of depression.
So Nashville was pretty fun. The coolest part was when I bought a map of the stars' homes, and my co-pilot and I went cruising around the far-regions of the town looking trying to catch a glimpse of the lifestyles of the rich and famous. Unfortunately, we didn't get to that until it was getting kinda late so we only caught a couple, but here they are for your viewing enjoyment.
First, we have Tim and Faith's house. This seemed kinda weird since we had to drive about a mile up a private road to find it.
Next was Dolly Parton.
This is Kenny Chesney's house.
Trace Adkins 
Last, but certainly not least was Alan Jackson's mansion. Seriously, his barn on the property is probably nicer than the nicest house in my home town. Now I know where all of these folks live for when I get invited to a party or to dinner at their house.
So, there you have it. Some of my sweet adventure to Tennessee. In my humble opinion, the south is a nice place plenty of friendly folk, but I would never want to live there. Sure they are as sweet as can be, but I don't think for my health it would be a good thing to be there long-term. You're hard pressed to find something that isn't deep-fried and smothered in butter. I'll tell ya, that's where my diet began to tank.
Me on the former (and still occasional) stage of the Grand Ole' Opry
LP Field, home of the Titans (sweet pic, I know)
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