Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Out with the Old, In with the New

Hi Everybody (or the handful of you who sometimes read this thing). On this final day of the year of our Lord, 2008, I find it appropriate to recap some of my favorite moments, accomplishments, etc. of the past year. And I'll be upfront, and admit that I am stealing the format from Jules.
Accomplishments:
2008 had a quite a few adventures and accomplishments for me, some bigger than others:
-Kept my New Year's resolution to go on at least two dates per month
-Started grad school, and survived (by the skin of my teeth) a very harrowing second term there
-Voted in a Presidential Primary for the first time
-Traveled to two new states, and a foreign country (if you can consider Canada foreign)
-Seriously took up learning to play the guitar--it's kind of fizzled, but will be back
-Saw two of the "big three" (my term) Mormon historical sites, Kirtland, OH and Palmyra, NY
-Got more familiar with the many historical and geological sites near my home
-Successfully found and set up housing for my roommate and me when our old lease expired (my first time to do the groundwork)
-Made my first campaign contribution(s), and volunteered time in a presidential campaign
-Got a sweet window office, and gave it all up a few months later for a cubicle and a pay raise
-Helped to make history by voting to elect the first black president of the US
-Helped some of my family to do the same
-Began dating, fell in love with, and got engaged to my future wife (only 87 days from today), surviving a brutal summer while she was away in Russia
-Successfully met her entire family, and fit in well with them on their family vacation, and at their family Christmas
-Introduced her to my family at Thanksgiving
-Managed to lose 12+ lbs during the holiday season
-Braved driving the streets of New York City (wouldn't recommend that to anyone)
Best new book read in 2008: I'll be honest, I didn't do a whole lot of reading for leisure this year. Any that I did do was for school, and when I had free time, I certainly didn't want to read since I had to read so much for class. Currently I am reading Ender's Game, which is surprisingly interesting, but I have yet to get to a point where I don't want to put it down. Of the books I read for school, one called "Being Good" was pretty good, and I did read "Believing Christ" one day in January, and that was a good. I have plans to read more this next year.
Worst new book read in 2008: Econ text book
Best book re-read in 2008
: Don't re-read books generally, but maybe I'll start
Worst book re-read in 2008: See above, but couldn't imagine that I would re-read one that I wouldn't enjoy
Best new movie seen in 2008: Dark Knight--Loved the Joker
Worst new movie seen in 2008: The new Indiana Jones movie--got it as a gift at our office Christmas party. It's a little far-fetched...even for Indiana Jones
Best decision made in 2008
: To start dating Melanie
Worst decision made in 2008
: To take Stats and Econ in the same semester
Best purchase made in 2008: Either Mel's engagement ring, or the tickets to the play we went to on our first date
Worst purchase made in 2008: I haven't really bought anything that I haven't used. I bought one shirt for the gym, which I returned after deciding that I didn't really need it at that point.
Best month of 2008: November--Obama won, I got engaged, and the Utes embarrassed BYU on the football field, thus giving them a perfect season and their second trip to a BCS bowl
Worst month of 2008: June--Mel left for Russia, and then my roommate Adam, my back up plan for entertainment, was sent to Tulsa for the summer on business. I was very bored.

So that sums it up, here's hoping that 2009 will be even better than 2008.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Simply Having A Wonderful Christmas Time

I think there is some strange romanticized version of Christmas in the nation's capital. During the past few days at the gym, the one TV that was set to TNT showed an advertisement every commercial break for "Christmas in Washington" that aired last night. The host was Dr. Phil and his wife, Robin. They had some local celebrities (I think--singers/performers), along with some B or C list celebrities (remember I said Dr. Phil Hosted?). I couldn't imagine that it would be all that great, but I thought it funny that there would be some sort of idea that Washington is the magical place at Christmas time. So, I watched with Melanie for all that I could handle, which was about two songs, but it was funny how they showed shots of the capitol in a computer-generated blizzard. So I thought it was corny and lame and bizarre all at once (and that was just the frozen look on Laura Bush's face).
Then I came into work this morning. I had left the radio on the all-Christmas station after riding with Melanie to the store last night. I decided to leave it there to be in a festive mood, as today is our work group party. After a long commercial that lasted most of the way to the office, I hear this slow 4/4 beat that had a bong-dong-DONG-dong sound. I'm like, "hmm, I've never heard this, what could it be?" Then the lyrics start: Something about snow in the Blueridge....then something going on in the Chesapeake Bay. I'm like "those are both near here." Then a mention of Georgetown and the Capital Dome. "What the?"
This was quickly becoming the lamest Christmas song ever. "It's Christmas Eve in Washington, America's hometown"...and it gets cheesier from there. So, I'm like, "does America really think that DC's a great place for Christmas?" It's not bad. It's a decent city. There are wreaths on buildings, there's the National and Capitol Christmas trees, and every office building has a nice tree inside, but that's about it. There is absolutely no snow at Christmas, and when there is snow in January, it becomes solid ice within a day. I was sitting there wondering why, if they wanted to give a realistic portrayal of Washington at Christmas, they weren't mentioning the mounds of homeless folks a block away from the White House in McPherson Square, or the crack whore in Southeast whose welfare is about to run out? Curiously left out was the drag queen in DuPont circle who was just dumped by his/her boyfriend for a younger, firmer catch, and is strung out on some drug from the neighbor, or the shot up corpse of a gang-banger who was found near U Street, not to mention that funky smell wafting off the Potomac. There was no talk of corrupt politicians or lobbyists, and not a word of drunken senior management getting sloshed and trying to feel up the interns at the corporate holiday parties. See, that's what Christmas in DC means to me.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Coolest Game Ever

Per tradition of the Langley Singles Ward, we delivered gift baskets to needy families for Christmas last night. This same family was the family to whom we donated money and food for Thanksgiving last month. They are recently-arrived refugees from Afghanistan (kind of awkward with the Christmas thing, but we played it off as an over-all holiday thing). We pretty much took Target gift cards, a gift card to the grocery store, and we bought a soccer ball for the two boys in the family since we had met them previously. There were three of us who went to this family last night, and they invited us in to visit when we showed up. We had small talk which moved to sports, and then we found out about the national sport of Afghanistan, Buzkashi.
"What is Buzkashi?" you may ask. Only the coolest game ever from what it sounds like. So, here's a brief description:
Items needed--One large field, 20-40 men with horses, and the carcass of a large goat, or small calf.
Per the description of the family we visited, play is as follows:
The game can be played as individuals or teams. The goat is soaked in water for two to three days. All participants wait at the periphery of the playing area while one person rides on a horse, carrying the goat into the center of the playing field. The goat is dropped into a demarcated circles, and play commences. The participants ride from outside the field into the center to snatch up the goat and carry it to the far side of the field and drop it into a circle there.
The catch to the game is that the water-logged carcass is rather heavy (approx 150 lbs.) and you are competing with dozens of other men on horseback who are fighting for the same goat. It takes great strength and equine agility. Apparently, it is standard practice for two to three people to be killed in a match, with several others sustaining injuries.
This game has been played for centuries in the region. Before the coming of Islam to the area, instead of a goat, the decapitated remains of an enemy were used, but with the religious influence on the region, that quickly became verboten, and they decided a cow or goat would be a fine replacement.
The winner of the match will generally win a cash prize, and will be showered with prizes from the spectators. Other prizes used to include Soviet Jeeps, or an AK47.
So, what do you say? Anyone up for a match? If you find the field and the horses, I'll bring the goat.


Friday, December 12, 2008

Question

What I don't get is why the financial institutions on Wall Street get $700 billion, and Detroit can't get a (comparatively) measly $15 billion.
Sure the model of the Big Three in Detriot has been flawed, but seriously, wasn't the model used by the CEOs of the big Wall Street firms equally messed up too? They ended up making Americans lose $1.2 trillion (12 zeros) in two days. Something's not right there. Now what gets my goat is that companies who are receiving tax dollars for bailouts are giving huge bonuses to executives. Doesn't seem right.
Without money to the auto makers, let's see how much more than $15 billion our economy loses in the next few days. Maybe I'll be proven wrong. It just doesn't make sense to me that the congress was so willing to trow tax dollars to white collar industries but are unwilling to budge when it comes to issues concerning the average American.
On the bright side, if the economy tailspins and goes into the next Great Depression, it'll be because of the Republicans. Just think how long the Dems will be in power then... (mwah ha ha ha)

Monday, December 8, 2008

Today's Things That Must Go

1). Commercials Targeted to the Elderly--If you're looking for an exhibit of the worst acting skills possible, listen to a little-old-lady singing the praises of her new Jazzy scooter, or watch the old man lauding the delivery of his Diabetes testing supplies to his front door. Granted, old people watch far more television than most, and should likely be targeted for advertising, but this type of commercial is an eerie reminder of what is to come to me. I don't ever want to get old, but seeing Wilford Brimley hawking some product only shows the depressing eventuality of my one day being a senior citizen.
2). The List of Potential Side-effects from Prescription Drugs Read on Commercials--I hate it when the list of what could happen ends up taking as much time as the explanation of what the drug does. No way would I want to take half of these things when I hear what could happen to me from using them. My favorite is the one that says "Seek emergency medical treatment if you experience an erection lasting four or more hours." Ouch!! I could only imagine that would be terribly uncomfortable. Hopefully I won't need to use Cialis or any of the others any time soon. Props to the commercial makers who have tried to get creative with reading the list (like having fake med-students listing them to their professor), but still it's irritating.
3). Irritating Christmas Music--I hadn't realized until this year just how much crappy Christmas music there is. And each of those crappy songs last at least one verse more than they should. I used to like the music of the holidays a lot, but I hadn't though of just how annoying most songs are for instance: "Feliz Navidad," Whatever the name of that song that the Chipmunks sing, the Beach Boys should never have ventured into Christmas tunes, "Malikalikimaka" goes entirely too long, "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer," though comical in theory (who wouldn't laugh at an old woman being trampled by a heard of reindeer?), is just to red-necky for me. "Santa Baby" is just kinda gross, as is "I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus," and I still hold that "The Little Drummer Boy" is the absolute worst Christmas song ever--EVER, followed closely by "Do You Hear What I hear." All of the above and many more should go, and thus, make my holiday music experience far more pleasurable.
4). Mitt Romney--Still a douche bag, still needs to go. Why? you may ask, I answer with why not? I was going to feel sorry for him and his wife Anne with her having had an operation for breast cancer this past week (best wishes for a speedy recovery--even though I think your husband is a disingenuous, lying, two-faced, scum bag who is willing to say, or do, or pay anything to try to get the presidency), but I can't. Yep, Willard is back to his old tricks again. as reported by the Boston Globe, he has raised over $2 million with his PAC, claiming that it was to help Republican candidates get elected. Guess how much his PAC gave to candidates...$240K. That's it. Where'd the rest go? To his own political consultants and campaign allies. Though there is really nothing illegal about this, the fact is, President-Elect Obama hasn't even been sworn into office yet. This just shows that Mittens only cares about his political career and doesn't really give a hoot in hell about America. While the vast majority of Americans are hoping that the next administration can succeed and help our country move out of this most-difficult chapter of our recent history, the spoiled, two-talking rich boy from Mass...wait, Michig...Utah (who the hell knows--I'm sure he'll claim wherever is politically expedient for him to be from) is praying for things not to be better so he can move in. C'mon you jerk, get over yourself and work for a better America, and give the next President the chance to get it right.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Anxiously Engaged

Today marks one month of my being engaged...betrothed, affianced, intended, what have you. Until now, I hadn't posted anything about it since most anyone who reads my blog (all ten of you) knew about my having popped the question within a few hours.
I won't bore you with details of the engagement. It wasn't a big production. It just involved my favorite place on the Mall in DC, and with my being a political nerd, I tied it into the historic event that had happened the previous night (I know I am lame. In fact, you might say I excel at it). So we chatted a bit, I tried to say something sweet, but mostly ended up fumbling up words, I got on one knee and with my hand shaking terribly, I groped for the ring in my pocket. By the time I presented it, I felt like an epileptic having a seizure, but I managed to at least ask if she would marry me. I don't know why I was so nervous. I knew what she was going to say. Maybe it's because I was afraid she wouldn't like the ring, though I was almost positive she would (and she really does). But she did say yes, and now, I am looking forward to four months from now when she'll be my wife.
It's a crazy, strange and terrifying prospect, but at the same time it makes me very happy to think that I'll get to spend my life with the woman I love. So that's enough schmoopyness from this guy. Below, you can find a picture of the ring. The pictures of the two of us from that night are still on my camera, so I'll put one on soon. Hopefully this will suffice for now.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Chat with Former Co-worker

This was a gchat conversation between a former co-worker and me yesterday. FYI GP stands for Granny Panties, which refers to an unfortunate incident (maybe two) where said former co-worker walked into the restroom and an older lady in the office was letting it all hang out in the stall with the door open. The image of her hurriedly pulling up her granny panties was permanently seared into her memory. From that day on, that woman (whose name I never learned though I worked in that particular office for well over a year) permantly became known as Granny Panties, or GP between the two of us.


Former Co-worker: um, you are supposed to be here
i am traumatized
me: uh oh
FCW: i went into the ladies room and...oh my eyes
me: what?
oh dear
GP again?
FCW: there's a conference here today. i went into the LR.
some woman looked at me weird. whatever. i do my thing.
i hear a weird noise. odd. i come out
that woman was pumping milk
WTF
me: WTF indeed
sick
FCW: she's at the sink closest to the door no less!
me: yikes
FCW: her equipment was on the counter, she's standing there with both udders getting milked
me: two at a time?
i didn't know they did that
FCW: i think so
me: eww
FCW: i didn't stare and was too freaked out to, anyway
all i saw was stuff attached to her. looked to be more than one attachment
me: so, you awkwardly washed your hands and ran to your office?
FCW: yeah
me: LOL
FCW: ok, i get it's natural, best for baby etc. but why do it so close to the door?! why not at the sink farthest from the door?!
me: yeah
for real
was it some electric thing
?
i've seen my sister's pump but it was manual
FCW: DUDE i do not know. it made a whirring sound
me: LOL
FCW: DUDE TMI!!!!!
me: no not on her
that would be sick
FCW: this woman looked like she was being milked like a cow.
so weird

And those were the good times that we had back in the old days.
Also, as an FYI, my first day to go to my new gym, guess who was there, none other than GP herself. Who Knew?